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Thoughts on history

My conception of history is that the last 2,000 years where ideology and dogma ruled, that was like training wheels on a bike. You use training wheels so you can get a good feel for how to ride a bike, but eventually you trust your ability to ride by feel enough to not need the training wheels.

I also think Earth is a school, and graduation already happened, like 10 years ago, so now it’s an adult planet where if you still use training wheels, you won’t be able to keep up, but if you haven’t developed a feel for how to live, well, life will just eat you up now. But I also think death is not a real ending, you’ll just respawn on some other high school planet to do more training.

We’re on the verge of extinction. We are poisoning ourselves out of life, and the Earth will survive and this little cancer, mankind, that’s growing all around her will die off the way a body gets a temperature and kills the germs off. Mother Earth will get rid of us because we’re a pestilence. But we don’t have to be. And we can join with the rest of life that makes it here on Earth with equanimity.

William Shatner

I’m so happy cause today I found my friends, they’re in my head

10 years ago, I started my gender transition, and I was, to put it mildly, not in a healthy place. I was very self-loathing. I cursed myself for being born such a strange person in a world that seemingly worshipped conformity. Born to a world of humans desperate to simplify themselves into becoming wondrous tools for the glorious machine. But in turning humans into interchangeable parts, few can hear the voice anymore. My voice was deeply buried before, but now it is clear and friendly.

I have a voice in my head; I’ve had a voice in my head, for a long time. I actually have lots of voices in my head. I would call the experience I’m talking about a “vision hearing” event. I “hear” a voice inside of my consciousness that sounds very coherent and consistent, it can be called an imitation of a personality OR a direct soul contact (Channel), I suppose. The voice changes, and I will hear it as dead celebrities. Very rarely do I vision hear personalities of living celebrities.

I usually have to be in a trancelike condition for this to occur vividly. The only drug necessary to initiate trance communication is cannabis. Other psychedelic drugs engender different experiences and have different uses, but cannabis and ketamine are the only drugs that truly facilitate this experience directly for me.

The voice can be truly uplifting and supportive, and the voice can be dark and angry, but in the last six years I’ve learned how to keep that voice positive by believing in myself and fighting to remake my life from ruinous self-destruction. On a deep level, I’ve healed from where there was only strife, a continuous war of shame and disgust against myself and the world. I’ve seen heaven and hell, literally and figuratively. But through a committed program of self-scrutiny and consciousness change, I now lead a progressively more stable and manageable life.

The voices will give me song lyrics, ideas, dreams, jokes, melodies, philosophy, and also mundane information about future occurrences. The voice will warn me when I’m going to do something self-destructive. The voice will encourage me and tell me what I look like on a spiritual level. The voices will inspire me to see my true potential.

Much of why I’ve struggled with this “condition” is that I grew up in Western American culture where people with shamanic gifts are persecuted. That is fine. They know not what they do. Love is undeterred by the shackles of darkness. My gift to this voice is growth in spite of adversity. But that’s not to say that it has been without tears or struggle. I just know that I’m strong now. I’ve developed the muscles to lift the heavy weight life has given me, so I am ok.

What a silly world that artists, shamanic individuals, priests, and other sensitives are ritually stomped on. This world will not last though. I have seen that. The world will persist, but many who are first will be last and many who are last will be first. Love and light win on Earth.

I’ve said enough. Peace, love, light, and acceptance to you, dear reader.

Notes on Change

In the long run, we get what we expect for ourselves. If we put qualities of life in a basket marked “Impossible,” they will never arise. We throw happy and peaceful and harmonious in the basket, laughing cynically at those who still believe in such ridiculous concepts. In this way, we forget our birthright: our nobility and our infinitude. We delude ourselves of our potential and label the rocket engines beneath us as mere chairs to sit on. A sapling of a Redwood tree is a giant tree in potentia. We are all the highest high, in potentia. But zombified and shameful we limp wanderingly into the desert of the predictable, the deadlands of “not possible,” substituting resentment for fulfillment.

Change is possible although nearly illegal, so it is understandable that people don’t believe they have the power to transform their lives by mere thought. But I have and continue to do so. There is a process for doing so, but it can be difficult to understand and can take years or decades to achieve. If one does not believe in life after death, there seems little point to attempting dramatic and fundamental changes that require obsessive dedication and self-sacrifice.

Death is not what most modern humans believe it is. This world is the dream and we return to the real world upon death. After death, we will wake up, remembering our true nature and our last memory before we were born on Earth. We will remember what our mission was on Earth and we will compare our intentions for this life to what we actually achieved. If we did not fully live out our character on Earth, we will come back to Earth or a similar planet to try again. The lesson must be learned.

When one finally arrives at the truth, we see that it is very simple. So simple is it that trying to explain it to others seems like quite the confused affair. Poetry and music seem to do it best, so I’m a songwriter. I’ve published quite a bit of material and am playing a show this coming Sunday. I don’t know that truth can be easily transmitted in an essay. It must be seen in the monitor of one’s third eye or felt in one’s heart. It can be transmitted by resonance though. One can behave in resonance with divine truth and others can possibly align their being with the resonating frequency they are perceiving from the divinely inspired individual.

Imagine you were never born
Imagine you will never die
Imagine that you chose to be exactly where you are
Imagine you are God
Merely become what you desire

There seem to be only two choices of understanding: the choice to see that one has choice or the apathetic slavery to instinct.

Why trying to be a spiritual teacher was not the way

I wanted to be a spiritual teacher but I thought I could be that while still being guarded and separate. Now I think I see that the best way to be a spiritual teacher is just to be open and loving to everyone I meet, and the universe will do the rest. Delusion is very cunning, and I still cling to selfish habits. I’m so grateful for my teachers who are often just random people that I encounter. Sure I’ve learned from Jesus, Buddha, etc. I’ve probably learned more by just following synchronicities. God is in everyone I meet, my enemies and my friends, often especially my “enemies.”

I’m grateful that you have read my words, and may you experience love today.

Why we fail: Zombies are coming

<!– why we fail –>
<p>There is a reason<br>they kill people before 30<br>Because if you <br>make it through your 30s <br>without killing someone or yourself<br>you’re invincible<br>Most flame out<br>How do you make it through your 30s?<br>Die<br>That’s Entertainment!!<br>

Pharmaceutical companies find chemicals that are sedatives and they do all kinds of tests on chemicals and develop specific energies for individual molecules. They focus pacifying energies on sedative derivatives of existing drugs. Then they own a chemical within your body on the energetic plane. They can sigilize that created chemical signature that has not been present in Earth space before, presumedly. Be careful of the chemicals you consume. I am victim not savior. I strive against too. Zombies are coming. Black coats are coming.
Scroll alphabetic nemeses<br>judicial system biases<br>Brought to you by<br>Hey! Fuck those Conscribulating Floors<br></p><!– why we fail –>